Could have been worse, I didn't wake up to discover that I'm a cockroach. 

I did wake up to find that I'm executive director of the Community Writing Center, at least according to the new City Weekly CityGuide "The Source for Life in Salt Lake City."

Somehow, my photo and part of my bio (I AM editor of Salt Lake magazine) got merged with that of Andrea Malouf, whom I presume IS the director of the Community Writing Center. Although I only have the word of City Weekly CityGuide "The Source for Life in Salt Lake City."

So you might want to double check.

Andrea (whom I have never met in the seven years I've been at Salt Lake magazine) was once editor here. I have no idea what she looks like, but the gap-toothed grinner in the CW City Guide's photo is me. Again, NOT helping other people learn how to write. I have enough trouble myself. 

To be absolutely clear, I am also not Anna Malouf (my daughter who works at St. Paul Preschool), I don't have a building named after me at Westminster, I don't sell fine linens, or advise on investments. Other local Maloufs do these things.

Fiinally, before the confusion spreads, I am reasonably sure that I'm not Giada de Laurentiis—we were recently seen in the same room.